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18 September 2026Latest Articles
THE IMPERIAL EPICUREAN GAZETTE
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The Cellar
By Inés Alcubierre, the Cellar desk1d agoInternational3 min read
What Your Favourite Cookie Says About Your Personality

What Your Favourite Cookie Says About Your Personality

Peanut butter, oatmeal, shortbread – we all have a cookie preference, and more often than not, what you dunk into your tea or coffee could let on more about your personality than you think.

Which Cookie Are You?

Whether you’re the ‘funfetti’ of the party, crumble under pressure or have a chip on your shoulder, there’s a cookie that represents everyone.

Chocolate Chip

Wholesome and sweet, but also has a hard time of ‘letting things go’ and walks around with a chip on their shoulder. Their people-pleasing, dependable nature can be a blessing and a curse. Had good grades in school and said they never studied for the test, but usually got straight A’s, and a B that one time. At the office, they’re the first to hand in their timesheet. Remembers everyone’s birthday.

Giant Oatmeal

Predictable but trustworthy. Likely to mention that they have IBS when ordering food at brunch. Gets cranky if they don’t get enough morning fibre. The parent or helicopter mom of the group; able to hold it together in tough situations, but secretly crumbling on the inside.

Fudgy Salted Caramel & Chocolate

Seems indecisive, but knows exactly what they want – usually the best of both worlds. Salty and sweet. Good sense of humour; throws insults, but always in good jest. Enjoys watching dating shows like Love Is Blind and Love Island ironically.

Funfetti Cookies

High energy, major Swiftie and wants the world to know it. You can count on them to be fun at gatherings. Never misses a social event in the name of FOMO. Has watched every episode of RuPaul’s Drag Race and dreams of being able to do a ‘death drop’.

Thick & Chunky Speckled Egg Cookies

Fashionable – wears items that shouldn’t match, but do. Feels like they’re a little too extra for some people’s liking, but they’re just the right amount. All over the show at times. They can never seem to find anything in their handbag, but they have their wits about them.

Classic Shortbread

What you see is what you get. In the dating world, shortbread is seen as ‘boring’, but is exactly what you want and need. Full of texture and substance; they’re great conversationalists too. Loves foreign and independent films; has dedicated their life to keeping up with the British royal family.

Cherry Crumble Bars

All about cottagecore. Weekend plans include visiting the farmers’ market and throwing unpretentious dinner parties with a plant-forward focus for friends. A known ‘foodie’, but hates that term. Will text: “Did you make it home safe?” after a night out.

Moerkoffie Cookies

Don’t talk to them until they’ve had their morning cup of joe – you can take your ‘kind regards’ and stick it where the sun don’t shine! Sarcastic but kind; likely a trailblazer with one too many tabs open on their laptop. Despises lengthy voice notes; they want to know the bottom line. ‘Icks’ include wearing sunglasses indoors and insisting that you tag along on weekend hikes.

Love astrology? Find out which sweet treat you are based on your zodiac sign.

Key facts
  • Who: Chocolate Chip Wholesome
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